Guys, DO NOT CRY when I’m around.

I’m sorry, that sounds very bitchy and mean of me, but that’s the truth. I don’t want to see you cry. I can’t handle it.

I’m a very emotional person, and have been for as long as I can remember, trust me I am trying with all my might to change that. When something or someone hurts my feelings, I cry and/or eat, A LOT! I let it all out, sometimes in the privacy of my room or car, or via novel long text messages to all my girls and a few guys that are willing to put up with my shit– hey that’s what friends are for right?

Yes, like almost all of us, I have made the mistake of crying in front of those heart breaking little assholes. Thinking back on those day, I regret it. It took me a while to finally gain the perspective I have now.

In the midst of a late night conversation with a guy of my past, I thanked him for not being the emotional one between the two of us. Why? Because its true, he was the more level headed sensible person and I was a wreck, each and every single time. The honest truth was that I cared a great deal about him and was too good at being a very impatient brat. And the award for best dramatic performance goes to…

That conversation led me to where I am now. Now that I think about it, I have only truly cared about a few genuine characters from my past, two of which I have made cry. You may be thinking, “God damn you K.Marie you’re such a heart breaking little wench!” Obviously you don’t know me then.

You see, I have been through hell and back. I’ve been lied to, used, led on, cheated on by various guys… Blah blah blah, all the same things that make girls cry day after day because, let’s face it, often times our love lives tend to suck big cahones. Well listen sisters, been there, done that, now it’s time to build a pretty little bridge and get the hell over it.

Keep in mind that K.Marie does not break up with people. Dumper? Not guily. Dumpee? Guilty, guilty, guilty! Of course when I do break up with someone, I feel bad. I’m not proud of knowing that I made someone feel the need to cry about it, but it makes for a very uncomfortable talk, especially in person.

I, K.Marie, tiny little asian and writer for the Neave, would like to publicly announce that I am sorry if I just so happen to have broken your heart. I’m sorry that I hurt you. I’m sorry that I cant sit there and watch you pour your heart out to me while you cry. I’m not trying to seem heartless, it’s just… It’s not going to get me back, the waterworks will not persuade me to change my mind. I understand that you’re hurt, I understand that you’re sorry for whatever reason I’m dumping you, but if it aint workin’ honey, you gotstah go. Maybe it wasn’t you, maybe it was me (God forbid that I actually used that line), but you’re a great person, seriously.

There are many men out there that feel the need to let out a good cry, and that’s totally fine by me. I actually support that if it helps with the grieving process. I do not support you going over to the girl’s house, the one who broke your heart, and expect her to act like she cares. Believe me, we do care even when we seem like we don’t, but seeing you cry just freaks the shit out of us.

Sometimes we’ll let it slide, depending on the situation. If a movie makes you tear up a little, then that’s your prerogative, just don’t cry buckets, please or more than me! You are only human and you can’t help it. I know sometimes you can get caught up in the moment. Us girls can admire men who show their emotions at the appropriate times.

Just think about what you’re doing, especially when you’re the one that’s an emotional mess. Kudos to those people that are able to properly communicate their feelings through words in such a fashion that doesn’t make me want to grab them box of Kleenex and a stuffed animal.