It was lovely to hear from you. Great to know that work is going so well and that you’re enjoying some time away this fall. I’ve never been to Greece but it’s been on my wish list for quite a while. Remember to post photos, and not just ones of the scenery! Maybe you can ask some glistening Greek God to take a picture of you with his blissfully buff brother! Just an idea!

Bodhi Gallery/EASTGALLERY

So I have some news. We got the green light! The green light is staring me in the face. The green light is demanding I take the next step. My time in limbo is ending. Time to check out.

It’s officially time to move to California, a place where I have never been, yet to which I blindly agreed to move some 12 months ago. Ironically, it’s also the place where, two years ago, I adamantly swore I would never live!

Note to self: The universe has a way of proving you wrong, so watch what you say!

Another note to self: Logic has absolutely nothing to do with making the right choice. When it comes down to it, it’s all about the feeling.

Does it feel right?

I’m starting to learn that the only way for me to answer that question is to set aside my preconceived notions, forget about what others are babbling in my ear, throw judgment and common sense out the window, and just..feel.

Does it feel right?

Does imagining myself making this move make me cringe? Does it make me want to shrivel up into a ball and hide under a poorly lit rock where no one can find me?

Yes.

Does that mean I might learn something from the experience?

Unfortunately, the answer to that question is also yes.

I have this feeling that the moment I set all emotion aside, when all thought and noise and chaos are silenced, when all I hear is silence, that’s when I’ll find peace with the situation. Being on an island with nowhere to escape is probably the best place for me to be right now. Nowhere to go but inside.

When I think about it, when I’m honest about it, I guess it took me one very brutal year of walking around my issues to eventually come face to face with them and to realize that I could have avoided a lot of pain. If only I had been more open with myself, if only I had silenced all the noise and just spent some time with ME, maybe I would have been able to avoid some heartaches, not had to endure some major spikes in stress levels, saved thousands of dollars and probably even steered clear of a few wrinkles along the way. But (and this is a big ‘but’), I can only say these things now because I’ve been through the experiences….that part I understand now. It’s the ‘how to move forward’ bit that I’m still kind of stuck on.

Let’s assume that the point of life is to experience. If we try to avoid experiencing, we end up forgetting to live. So, yes, it was hard, but I think I learned a lot about myself along the way. It was kind of like constantly being on a first date with myself. There was so much to learn, so many questions to ask and so much to discover that it was sometimes tough to know where to start. And then of course, what if you discover something you didn’t want to find? Sort of hard hiding from yourself…and believe me, I’ve tried.

Anyway, Ibiza’s been great, but Ibiza and I have not had the best relationship in the past. I remember hearing the name of the island when I was still a young child and feeling very unsettled. I remember thinking that I would not, under any circumstances, give the island the satisfaction of having me visit it again.

Again?

Perhaps my journey started much early than I had originally thought. In any case, I knew that I never wanted to return to the island. It made me feel miserable just thinking about it – as if I had been deeply rejected there once before.

It’s so ironic. I’m writing to you about getting ready to move to a place to which I swore I’d never move, in the very place that I was sure I would never go. And what did I say about the universe proving me wrong?! The funny thing is, this is one of the most graceful, gentle islands I’ve ever visited! The scenery is absolutely beautiful. The hills are blanketed with lush green forests framing bountiful Spanish farmland where houses look like they’ve been witness to the growth and development of this island from the very beginning.

Yesterday we were puttering through one of these regions with our little white scooter and I happened to catch a glimpse of an old man sitting on what I can only imagine was his family’s land – a land that I’m going to pretend was passed down to him from generation to generation. He was just sitting there, on a chair, by himself.  I think he was working with his hands, maybe pealing chestnuts, perhaps the very chestnuts that he would eventually use to prepare local recipes. All I know is that he was sitting alone, in a quiet field, looking totally at peace, while I zoomed by polluting the air and feeling the withdrawal of not having access to the Internet for two whole days! What kind of a world do I live in? How can our worlds, mine and this old man’s, co-exist? Is one eventually going to devour the other? Are we eventually going to trade in simplicity for efficiency all together? In the name of what? Evolution?

The sun is so simple. The sun simply is.

The sea is so simple. The sea simply is.

Have we forgotten how to just be? The strangeness of the concept makes me think that we have.

Just briefly, let’s go back to the point about the Internet. Yes, I know that I’m supposed to be on holiday, and yes, I know I said I wouldn’t bring a computer with me on holiday (thereby actually making it a holiday), but there’s a very good reason why the laptop has come along on this Balearian adventure. We’re still waiting to hear from the lawyers. If that’s not good enough of an excuse, then I must be in some serious denial over my addiction to the world wide web, but let’s set that aside for now and go back to the lawyers.

Source: Shutter Sisters

When we left Rome, we knew the lawyers were getting all the paperwork ready to submit the petition for permission to work in the US, but from the experience of witnessing people around us trying to move to the States, we knew that it wasn’t going to be a simple process. We went on holiday (originally defined as the only time in the last year sin computer) knowing that when we returned, we’d have to be ready to draft more documentation, request additional letters, and basically do whatever we had to in order to start our new life.

We were told by the owners of the Spanish villa, who so graciously allowed us to stay here at a moderate price, that there was no Internet in the flat, but that there were numerous Internet cafes and wifi hotspots on the island if we needed to get our fix. To our pleasant surprise, while I was unpacking, hubby thought he’d be clever and just check if there was an open connection available – and there was! So for two blissful days, we enjoyed the comforts of home, emailing pictures of our trip to family, updating our statuses on Facebook and checking our email for anything ‘important’…namely, news from the lawyers!

Day 3 was a bit disappointing though. The connection suddenly dropped and we were once again ‘on vacation’. We tried! We really did! We toured some of the island, visited a few beaches and took some more photos to at least have some proof that we were actually on holiday. But when Day 5 came around, we just couldn’t handle it anymore! Armed with laptop in protective case, snuggled comfortably in trusty Nike backpack half full of important documents in the event  they would be needed (essentially, equipped with our trimmed down portable office) we headed out, determined to find a cheap connection to the outside world.

Walking along the promenade in Santa Euralia, where people normally enjoy the view of the sun, sand and sea, we were looking in the opposite direction – gazing intently down the narrow island streets for an @ sign. In the corner of my eye, I saw a lounge! I love lounges! Funky music…ok! Cool decor…super! FREE WIFI!?!?! Let’s go! Let’s go!! Let’s go!!!

Source: Gourmet Gal

One pitcher of sangria later, we were Skyping family while Amy Winehouse sang of her affinity to the color black, giving them the good news! Congratulations! You’re been approved!!! What a moment of bliss…followed by a long minute of silence as we digested the feeling of having won. Then…a somewhat unexpected feeling of exhaustion. I guess once I started releasing all the tension that had been building up the closer we got to the end of this tormenting journey into the start of a new chapter, the numbness began to subside. I started to get feeling back. The first thing I felt was pooped!

Dinner that evening consisted of salmon tartar plopped on a bed of milky avocado goop swimming in florescent green cucumber juice (tasted worse than it sounds!!) followed by a fantastic fillet of beef in a blue cheese sauce. Overall, not a bad day.

Did you notice how I’m talking more about my drama then I am about Ibiza even though this postcard is from Ibiza and I’m writing it while in Ibiza? Shouldn’t I be focusing on Ibiza? Well, that’s what life is like when you’re bouncing around from one place to another. It’s about learning how to avoid getting torn apart in the whirlwind (and sometimes that might mean talking about yourself a little too much).

Things are ever-changing, constantly in motion. I’ve had to learn that no matter where I am, what I’m doing or how I choose to live out my days, the world keeps spinning. You can either choose to disconnect, and then perhaps become that old man sitting peacefully in his chair (or, at least, I’d like to think he was peaceful), or you keep up! We’ve chosen to keep up…but I kind of hope that one day, keeping up won’t seem so important.

Looking forward to hearing about your Greek adventures!
Until next time…

Source: Shutter Sisters

Author: Kat Kiddles

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