Richard Ramirez was a sex machine.  He could have been an American Idol.  A Playgirl Centerfold spread.  An American Icon.

Unfortunately, Ramirez pulled some silly shenanigans that prevented him from becoming any of the above and ultimately his fate was sealed.

What could Richard Ramirez have done differently?

How could he have blossomed into the mainstream instead of reamaining forever a cult phenomenom whose lover letters must be processed by the California Department of Corrections?

I’ll tell you how.

First of all, was it really necessary to murder 13 women?  And make attempts at 5 others?  And sexually assault 11 of them?

That’s simply not a way to a woman’s heart, Richard, but I’ve got to tell you–you really added insult to injury when you raided your victims’ refrigerators and then regurgitated and defecated on the same floors you raped and hacked their bodies.

Still, Ramirez has a big enough cult following of women who can see past–or maybe even embrace–the brutal rapes and murders and the nutty idiosyncrasies, such as raiding the fridge and then pooping on the living room floor, and bask in the unique brand of love that only a handsome serial killer can inspire.

So to all the Ramirez admirers, here’s a lovely tribute to the man who has stolen the hearts of so many (in one case, hacking off a breast and tearing into the chest cavity to remove one with his bare hands):