Your nails look like you’ve been kicking bricks.

Your hair has enough grease to cook burgers for an entire football team.

Your eyes are puffy from the crying you try to avoid but find taking over you.

Your body is aching from the fatigue of heartbreak.

You smell like shit.  You look like it too.

But even worse.. is what heartbreak FEELS like.  Because heartbreak knows no boundaries.  It doesn’t know when timing is right.  It doesn’t know what logic is.  It doesn’t know how to go away.  It doesn’t know how to stop itself.  It just sticks around until the numbness takes over.

Recently, I tried to explain to my heartbreaker… that he had indeed broken my heart.  He could not understand the phenomenon.  I told him there was no timeline or reasoning behind how it came about because emotions are omnipotent.  He felt sorry for having broken it but I did want an apology from him.  I did not want remorse or acknowledgment.. and I still am unsure of what I do want.  Reconciling?  Understanding?  Bonding?  Him to just want me back or cuddle with me?  Him to hug me after a long day’s worth of work?  Him to apologize and tell me he’s been a jerk and made a mistake?  Him to pursue me and make me his again?

*sigh.  I guess.. heartbreak is tough but there’s always a simple solution… cuz really, at the end of the day, I just want him to get his fucking heart crushed too!!