This is something that has been bothering me and I finally decided to write about it. I hate it when people spoil their pets. Buying a flat screen TV for your piece of shit Wiener so it can watch animal planet all day is just dumb.
People in Somalia are dying because they can’t even find a loaf of bread to chew on and you go buy your dog diet food? DIET FOOD FOR YOUR DOG!?! Why don’t you get off your fat ass, along with your fat fucking dog and go walk around the block or something, huh fatty?! Maybe both of you will score dates. No, fuck you, I’m not mean, it’s the truth and you know I’m right, you might be like “LyKe OmG!!! that’s so mean I would never say that to anyone, Neave!!” You wouldn’t say it, but you think it, and that’s all that matters.
Girls, what is up with you people getting all wet when you see a cute dog? I’ve seen girls, walking around, bitchy looking as all hell; however, upon seeing a dog, they pretty much shit themselves. First thing they say is “puppy!! oh em gee puppy! how cuteeee!!!” What an un-original reaction.
Never buy a dog, cat, platypus -or whatever creature you decide to buy and torture with your existence- shoes. THEY ARE ANIMALS!!!? Evolution, man! They don’t need loafers! They are fine with what they have!
I don’t understand the concept of buying a shirt for your German shepherd. That is like taking Chuck Lidell and dressing him like an elf with a pink bow tie or something. I honestly don’t agree with that, I don’t care what you say, my post, my thoughts, my goodies. I also don’t like when people spend money on their dog’s nails, and I am not talking about getting them cut and whatnot. I am talking about getting them colored. Go fix your nails first miss “I do blow-a-lot” and then think about your dog’s nails.
Oh and god forbid, your dog has to push it self to jump on your STD infested bed. Buy it stairs!!!
Why don’t you buy it a phone so when it gets lost it can call you?! Hmm!?!
Last but not least, name your pets something cool. Don’t call your huge German Shepherd “twittles.” It will kill the dog’s self-esteem.
Buy me a drink. What’s my name? What’s my sign? Baby girl I’m so damn fine….
what?
